What a day.  I got up at 4:00am and took my time getting ready to go.  My dad and I got to the airport and to the gate right about 5:15.  Perfect timing for my 6:15 flight.  Except for one thing.  During times of stress, I get a bit of dyslexia with numbers.  The flight time was 6:51.  grrr....
Uneventful flight to Phoenix, and an uneventful drive to Tucson.  I was able to get 6 hours of work done today, so that rocks.
Grandpa's not doing so well.  He reacted when my aunt told him that my dad and I were here, and he tried to say something when I talked to him.
My gut tells me Friday will be the day.  I don't know why, my gut is just telling me this.
Tomorrow at around 3:00 (that's 5:00pm central since AZ doesn't have DST), I'll start the trek to Phoenix, and I should be in St. Louis by around 11:00pm.
Andy's doing great.  He had his appointment today and Mommy took him.  His counts are almost normal.  This is very good.
I've become so used to seeing people like this (remember, 2 grandmothers, 2 aunts, a couple cousins, etc. in 2006 alone), that it was no surprise to me to see Grandpa in this condition.  I tried to explain to my father what to expect, and still he was shocked.  I was a bit upset with him at first, thinking "Once again, you refused to believe me when I tried to explain this to you" then I realized that unless you've been through this 5 or 6 times in the last year, you just can't be ready for it.
Nothing new to report.  I'm just glad I got to see my grandpa and his house just one more time.
I have now become emotionally numb.  I knew that if I saw my grandfather in this condition and it didn't phaze me that it means I have now become emotionally numb.
The other night I tried to cry, but couldn't.  I knew it would be healthy to do so, but I just didn't really feel the need to do so despite feeling down.  I think it's safe to say that emotion is pretty much gone with me....  except anger.  And frustration.
Greetings from Tucson.
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
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1 comment:
You will cry eventually and your anger will fade, too. Emotions and feelings change, thank god! Hang in there Danny!! We love you very much! Have a safe trip home.
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