Friday, October 26, 2007

Craziness

[Warning: Long post]
Wow, I'm back to averaging 3 posts a day again. If you haven't checked all day, there's still a couple more down there somewhere.

Today was somewhat of an awakening on many levels. It all came to me, of course, whie I was downstairs playing the drums today. Spent a couple quality drum hours downstairs. I reached a new milestone in the drum learning process. And I'm very happy to be reaching milestones when I'll I'm trying to do during this period is just maintain where I was before this started.

Be that as it may, it's still the most therapeutic 2 hours of my week.

A few months ago, June-ish or July-ish, before this craziness, I realized something. I realized I was getting ready to make a transition in life.

Stop. Rewind. If you don't care then stop readng now.

I will spare you the details, but there has been a pattern. It's a pattern I'm sure is common. Maybe. Every time I enter a new phase of life (at least those I remember well), I go through a seemingly long period of confusion and awkwardness. It is followed by a seeming tragedy (at least to me), then depression. Then the transition is made as things normalize for a few years. I have always come out the other side as a better person.

I realized that for the last year or so, I've been acting very strange. Not myself. At all. Frankly, I've been an ass. And I'm aware of it. And I have been aware of it. But I haven't changed it. In fact, the last month or so I've been seeing how far I can push it on this website. Now I know, so now I'll chill out for a little while. Yeah, I'll still be an ass, but only every once in a while now.

Obviously a tragedy has occurred. That is, something catastrophic relative to my own myopic perspective. Or maybe there's been a couple things.....

I think I'm about to move into the next phase of life.

I dunno. We'll see. I know for sure that a year from now I will not be the same person I was just a few months ago.

The big guy upstairs and I have not been in good terms lately. It's just a little pissiness between the two of us for right now. Just like in any friendship, marriage, or even between two close family members, God and I have our ups and downs.

Even if you don't know Greg, you feel like you do if you've been reading this crap. You can obviously see from our back and forth with each other that he and I are really good friends. (cousins too) Greg and I have gone through our pissy phases over the years where we'd go a week or 2 or 10 without talking to each other for whatever reason.

Julie and I, like any married couple, go through phases where things are out of whack.

God and I do too. We always have.

But we always wind up becoming buddies again soon afterward.

Yeah, God, I need your help right now. Let's go grab a beer and some wings at Hooters. My treat. Any help here would be great. Andy's surgery is Wednesday, that would be a great time to keep a close eye on things.

Today was the best jam I've had in a long time. There are times when you play songs better than other times. It's true for all musicians. When you can go for a couple hours straight playing your songs at "max performance" you really have reached a milestone. Even if it doest happen again for a while, it's still a milestone.

I'm gonna go eat my Applebees.

Have a good weekend all. See ya tomorrow.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Go Andy Go!!!
Love Pai

Anonymous said...

Okay, I have to clear the air a bit, and not because I farted (well, that too). For anyone that does not understand some things, I make a lot of jokes for the simple fact that it is my effort to bring a smile to people's faces, that desperately need one. In no way does that mean I am forgetting the reasons for this site.
I have learned over the years that I get upset because I place expectations on people and God, but they do not know it. So when they do not meet those expectations, I tend to get really hurt and/or mad. Yes, this is especially true with God. I expect that he will not inflict such pain on a little child, his family and friends. So when he does, it hurts and it pisses me off, big time. The best way I have learned to deal with pain is through laughter. I will never apologize for this, it is part of who I am.
I do not have many friends, and the ones I do have are my family. I hold family very dear because without them, I have virtually nothing. So when I diret my anger at God, rest assured, from what I have read he can handle it. Besides, I get it from him. I just don't have the power to flood the earth, bring down plagues...etc...Goodness knows I would have already.
Tons of people know who I am, but very few really know me. Just in case you were wondering, no I have not been drinking, please observe the post time. Danny, never apologize for being human. If you think you could have done things differently in certain situations, that's fine, work on it. Remember if you want to see what kind of person you are, look at with whom you associate (don't include me in on that or it will screw everything
up).
It would be very easy for me to say things will be fine and all will be well, but I do not know this. What I do know, from my own personal experiences, is that sometimes the worst things that happen to us, turn out to be some of the best things to ever happen. It just takes time to realize this. I could list several examples, but anyone that knows me, already knows what they were.
I am not preaching to you, nor attempting to give advice, I was reflecting on your post and figured I needed to share some things.
I read this site every day and I make a lot of jokes and have fun. At the same time, I keep expecting and waiting to see the post that says Andy has won!

Anonymous said...

I love to read all of your comments. Your explanation of why you are always being funny is not necessary but it is sweet and interesting. I know who you are and I know that you are a big supporter of Danny, his family and the rest of our family for that matter. Thanks for the comic relief and for your friendship and support.